Perfect Ambivalence

May 9, 2014 – 9:49 am

For some, love is just a moment and outside of that moment, it ceases to exist. Love can be taken as easy as given and this feels sane to the one in control.

For me, if you feel my love, you have been given a piece of my soul and when you pull back, it’s going to tear.

Love is an inconvenience for some
Love is just a word for some
Love is distance for some
Love is a secret

I can do nothing and it will probably go on for a bit longer, but I’ve always been bad at doing nothing. You are truly amazing. With each amazing love, comes a spectacular pain so great, that sometimes you have to laugh to keep from dying.

They say, “Be confident”, but confidence is no match for the truth.

You will leave and then my “situational depression” will come out of its cocoon into spread its wings in to a month long fetal hell fest, knowing that I couldn’t make even a so called “normal” relationship work.

You will forget about me. There will probably be a few “what was I thinking” statements to your friends, you will regain the distance you need, find a few “friends with benefits” and drive the freeways with your nice car and a smile with perfect ambivalence.

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